Agreeing On The Tough Decisions Up Front
There are many decisions that may have to be made throughout the surrogacy process. I recommend you do NOT enter into a surrogacy arrangement without agreeing on answers with your spouse. Our Delivering Dreams team will help you navigate them, but these are very serious considerations and worthy of a good deal of thought before you start.
These issues need to be discussed and agreed upfront, not just because they will be clearly spelled out in the surrogacy contracts when you begin the process, but because they are issues that spouses can disagree on.
They are topics that could be glossed over but should be thoroughly hashed out. Please consider in advance:
- What kind of communication do you want with the surrogate throughout the process and pregnancy?
- What type of relationship would you like with the surrogate after birth?
- Are there any genetic diseases in the family history that might be passed on to the child?
If so, it is important to evaluate the benefits of genetic testing for you as a parent and/or a donor.
- Do you wish to choose the sex of your child?
- How many embryos would you like to implant? (Please refer to the section later in this book on the pros and cons of each option.) Ukraine allows up to two embryos implanted.
- Would you want a selective reduction?
- Under what circumstances?
- Would you want the pregnancy terminated if there were complications with the fetus?
What complications are acceptable, and which are not?
What will you do with any embryos left over?
There are several choices. You can keep them frozen, especially if you think you might want to have a sibling in the future. You can donate them for scientific research or have them destroyed.